Meaningful Connections on Facebook

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I’ve considered deactivating my Facebook account for 101 reasons …but I will not bore you with all of them 🙂 While contemplating on this step, I decided to create a temporary account that would manage both my blog and business page on Facebook.

I only added three people, my 2 kids and my husband to this new account because I had no plans of making it permanent. I simply wanted to stay away from Facebook as much as I can. After a few days I added family, my mom and two brothers who live abroad and my in-laws and received new friend requests from close friends.

The last time I checked (as if I regularly do), I only have about 700 or so FB friends. Seriously, 700 friends? How come I only get to “hang out” or “talk” with only a few of these 700 online friends. Where are the rest?

I realized too that the number of “true” friends I have are more or less 100 people. You know, the ones whom I have real connections with. In reality, the rest are strangers or mere acquaintances… Some I made connections recently or years ago but truth is, after that initial excitement of having a new friend, there was no sincere connection.

Isn’t it ironic that we (Filipinos) who are known for being friendly and hospitable are at the same time arrogant and condescending? And this scene plays out so well in social media. I admit that I have been to eager to accept new friend requests but later on regretting it.

Sometimes this trait of being too friendly gets us into trouble, making us fake or plastic. You think just because you’re on each other’s FB friends list, it automatically makes you friends in real life. That is a big misnomer. I’ve experienced seeing my so-called friends on Facebook in person, ie, bumping into them at the supermarket or at the mall, your eyes meet and for some strange reason, they walk away or ignore you altogether. What’s up with that?

How about those people who watch your every move, every project you make, create the same thing you’re doing and post it on Facebook! Stalker alert!  Don’t get me wrong here. I am not saying you can’t do what I do nor do I have sole ownership of everything in creative world. But to replicate especially my business and recreate the same products as I sell is very alarming. When I shared this with a friend, she told me that I should be flattered. Honestly, it’s not flattering at all, kind of creepy actually. Don’t you have your own ideas? To each his or her own creativity 🙂

Photo from Padurariu Alexandru

Photo from Padurariu Alexandru

And of course, my all-time favorite group of friends, the Born-again Christian bashers kind of FB friends. I have been very vocal about the faith I profess in real life and in social media. I cannot hide it, it’s who I am. I am not a secret agent follower of Christ. I do not live a perfect life nor do I claim to have one. Somehow these friends think I do and that I’m too high and mighty or self-righteous at that with my posts. They also assume I am leading them towards a different “religion” or that I am “converting” them. Converting to what?110 volts to 220? Kidding! I am not the Holy Spirit to convert anyone, that is His job.

There is huge difference between sharing the truth from God’s word and outright condemnation. If my post says: 5 For there is one God and one mediator between God and mankind, the man Christ Jesus, 1 Timothy 2:5   I would then be tagged as anti-____ (fill in the blanks). narrow-minded or judgmental of others. Wait, what? What did I say? Are these even my words? Can’t I quote scripture and share with friends who might need encouragement or enlightenment?

How come we easily click the like button when we see quotes from famous people like celebrities, philosophers, and highly intelligent people? Yet frown upon Bible verses, inspirational or challenging quotes based from God’s word. Man’s quotes are likeable or acceptable but when it’s taken from the Bible and challenges the thinking or belief, it is frowned upon and label the person who posted as downright judgmental. I say, that’s ridiculous!

Then, within that period, I decided to make the temporary Facebook account my new account. I want to have the freedom to share family updates with our relatives both here and abroad. I want the freedom to express the truth without being tagged as prejudice or judgmental by my real friends. I also want to give the “others” the choice if they want to still be connected with me. No hard feelings, no harm done. It’s all good.

At this age or should I say, season in my life, I would rather have a few friends on Facebook and in real life but have meaningful connections rather than a thousand but with a dead connection. I’m still in the process of adding real friends to my new Facebook account and It’s fun to answer their questions about the change.

Do you have a lot friends on Facebook? How many of them are you sincerely connected with? Let’s share in the comments.