Jude AgbayaniDo you remember what you wanted to be when you grow up? We get asked this question a lot when we were young. Some of us would exclaim, “A doctor!”, “A nurse!”, “A policeman!”, or “A pilot!”
Twenty to thirty years later, how many of us are living out that dream today? Hmm, I got you there! Are you? If not, why?
“My family couldn’t afford Medicine, so I took up Accounting instead.”
“I didn’t know what course to take. I lined up in the shortest enrolment queue and ended up taking Philosophy.”
“We are a family of lawyers. I had no choice. ”
“I got pregnant and didn’t finish my degree in Nursing.”
The Sad Reality
Can you relate? Especially, if you are part of the GenX generation where parents had so much influence on our courses. Many of us were too afraid to speak up because that was how our parents and grandparents raised us.
Also, at 16 or 17, we were still unsure about what we want to do in the future. We survived four years of high school. How in the world can we figure out what to do next? But there are some exceptions, of course. We have batch mates, who at a young age, have set their hearts and minds to what they want to be in the future. Good for them.
But how about for the rest of us? It may sound cliche but the struggle is real especially for me. You may already know my background. I am a dentist by profession and practiced for more than 15 years. Until I finally called it quits in 2016 and focused on a small food business that my husband and I started.
The Journey to Somewhere
I knew from the time I started seeing patients on a regular basis, Dentistry was not for me. Something in my heart tells me that I am made for something else. But I couldn’t quit, not yet. First, I was a mom with two young kids. I couldn’t afford to take a new job and leave them. That was my non-negotiable. Second, I had to honor my parents who put me to school and supported me. Third, it was a struggle but I had to adhere to the oath of my profession.
Even if I wanted out, I had no idea what to do. I have studied for a long time and my profession was my source of income. When I shared my sentiments with other people, they couldn’t understand my predicament. They told me to stick with it and suck it up. And I did for years. But the Lord has His ways. I was able to say goodbye to the profession that took care of me for more than 15 years. You may want to read my transition from being a doctor to a small business owner.
Business is good because God is good. I love food and I love creating recipes from scratch. That’s why my business tagline is freshly prepared. But I had this tug in my heart for many years to do one more thing and starting a business is not that “one thing.”
It is writing.
What I really want to be when I grow up
People say I can write and I write well. Thanks to blogging, my writing has improved over the years as some friends have noticed. I need to develop and improve because I have no diploma or certificate to boot. But I am pursuing writing as a career now.
The Lord has been very good to me because He affirms this new desire of my heart. He has given me writing jobs in the past years. Today, He has given me more. I received a long-term writing project that may even a permanent one. Of course, I was ecstatic but I didn’t say yes right away. My default was to turn to God for wisdom. I know that not all opportunities are God’s opportunities. I also sought my husband’s wisdom on the matter.
After a few days, in a quiet conversation with the Lord, I asked, “Lord, do you want me to take this job? Is this for me?” Then, He replied, “Didn’t you pray for a writing job last year? I’m giving this to you now.”
Let me share my IG post the other day about this new journey of mine.
But when I sought God’s wisdom and comfort, I was able to free myself from the fear and insecurity that has held me captive for a long time. In His perfect time, I am able to pursue what I love to do.
Now that I am walking on this new path the Lord has prepared for me, I am so excited to “work”. In fact, I don’t see it as work anymore. It is an opportunity to hone the gifts that He has given me. At the same time, it becomes an instrument to help others grown their business.
As I write this post, the Lord reminded me of the verse that so aptly describes this new season in my life.
Delight yourself in the Lord: And He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
When people asked me what I want to be when I grow up, I would say, “I want to be a doctor.” But I forgot for a brief time in my younger years if people asked me the same question, I would reply, “I want to be a writer.”
How about you? Are you living your childhood dream?
